Wednesday, September 16, 2009
So..
@ age 5, I wanted to become the president of China. Stood on the bed with my right hand raised in salute as the news played the national anthem at 6pm.
@ age 6, I remember drawing my first imaginary house.
@ age 10, I moved to the United States and saw the overacting, genius that was Jim Carey. That inspired me to become an actor (perhaps not the overacting, but the more Academy type).
also @ age 10, I continued to explore drawing houses and buildings (I wish I still had some to post up, but they got lost through the many moves... -__-)
@ age 11, with the influence of my parents, I began to think of a more "practical", or more stable and safe career path. I obviously choose.. Architecture.
from age 11-15, I continued to live and play as a kid should, while under some pressure from the Asian family mindset. I believed that I would grow up and design some great skyscrapers that would sit in the heart of New York City and forever become a landmark to anyone who has or wants to visit the city. It would become the symbol of American freedom~ or so I dreamed.. as my parents crushed it with ease.
@ age 16, the college application process began and the rents revealed their true intentions and master plan for my life. I applied to University of Michigan College of Engineering and got in.
@ age 17, I completed High School with the most oblivious mindset, not knowing what was to come, more importantly, not caring about what's to come, or even attempting to think about it.
@ age 18, I move to Michigan and sort of begin the rest of my life.
What does any of this have to do with living the dream? Well, clearly I have not and probably will not be able to achieve the dreams I've had growing up, President, Actor, Architect, in their true essence. Of course, who really does.. Who grows up wanting to go to the moon and actually goes to the moon, a few of us, but not most.
I was actually quite shook in college when I realized that I was studying something I had "slight" interest in, but I kept with it because it was the "right" thing to do. I must say, I've learned so much from being an Engineer, whether it's some actual interest that was dormant deep down, or coincidence, or me trying to make my parents proud.. whatever it is, I made the best out of my academia years.
~ FIRST YEAR OF COLLEGE ~
This is the year that changed me and reshaped my entire core.
Her name was, well, we'll call her JK. She was the first real love of my life, beyond high school crushes, and beyond the superficial. This was the first time I've felt the meaning of love. I must say, it ainnnnn't bad! ^_^.
I am in a very strange place right now. Can't explain yet, perhaps another day, not after a 5 hour practice session.
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So how does living your dreams and finding love in college have anything to do with eachother?
For me, love has become the new dream. The next thing after Architecture. It has been since that first day when I found it. The difference between this and the other ones, is that, I do not need to use it to make a living, to feed me and shelter me. Something I can love for what it is, all the happiness and all the heartbreaks of it. So I guess you could say, love set me on my path for the rest of my life. Wherever my career takes me, this love thing will always be with me, because whether I've been hurt by this sensation or not, I want it.
Love is forever. Its metamorphosis is in the air we breathe, in the moon that shines just outside our windows, and on the park benches around the world. Something that will never go away, even til the last day of the Earth, where love will live in the galaxies far beyond our time.
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@ age 23, I begin working at Pfizer as Solution Engineer (research informatics). Not the dream job I've thought about since I could start to think about a career, but it is feeding me.
Love lives on my cubicle wall as I glance up once in a while at my reminders for hope. Love lives in the CD that plays as I drive to and from work everyday.
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