Resume Workshop

Monday, December 14, 2009

So I sit here, 3 projected hours of learning. "This is how you write your resume"

I wanted to stand out, so good luck to the institution on teaching all of us in this course to be ... different ... together. oxymoron yea?

Anyways, maybe it's the uncomfortable chair, or maybe its the super-duper-over-pronunciation of the instructor.  Perhaps, it's simply the fact that the 23 people who are in this room (myself included) are most likely about to be laid-off.  These 23 faces, focused on the instructor and the slides, focused as if this was a last salvation.  Seldom laughter is perhaps a break from the strain that is between the eyes, the wrinkles from this endeavor.

At first the mood is sad. a depressing, leaving mood.  now, as if challenged by some force of nature, a pack of hyenas looking to devour something... me.  Although I do not really feel this way, this hostility, but some seem to have it, as shown by their questions, or should I say "attacks".  A question with some sort of other purpose + some attitude + some eye rolling + some "im better than you"... I don't enjoy it lol

Now, I can't help but reflect.  Why am I not feeling what they, apparently feel...  Maybe I just have no roots here, or maybe I am so infatuated with the possibilities of the future that what is really happening is irrelevant!  Whatever it is, my natural instincts to fight for survival have not kicked in ... or maybe they have and this is how I handle it?

Who knows.  What a depressing room.  I don't care how many jokes the instructor makes, they're not really that funny.  It's funny how your physical looks inevitably reflect how you feel inside.  inevitable.  "i see how you feel" amazing ~ 0_o

Get me outta here.

Lately

Saturday, December 12, 2009

For the past few weeks, I haven't been writing here...


I haven't been talking about emotions...


I haven't expressed feelings...


I have been however, experiencing.  Only input and minimal output.  Sorting through the infinite knowledge gained in my library, sometimes staying late to catalog a few more stories.  The idea of living life and observing life simultaneously seems, hypothetically impossible.  So the next logical question that will satisfy my curiosity is ...


What shall I do, observe life or live life.  Like the photographer that is in the midst of the battle, he captures glory through the lens.  He reviews it later, and that is how he lives, through a different scope than the ones he was born with.  This man is leaving behind his memory, in 2D.  The story teller leaves behind his memory in his words, and the writer leaves behind his memory on paper.  Is it then, selfish to only live life and not share for the folks who were not fortunate enough to make it to that magnificent display of whatever?


If not sharing life is the selfish route, can the act of living life be even a little bit selfless?  One prominent human characteristic is the desire to have few children and invest a massive amount of time and energy into them.  Could this characteristic carry over to friendship and relationships in general?  I know that some of us rather have MANY MANY "friends", maybe too many to keep track of their current jobs or their marital status, while others like myself have MANY friends, but keep some very close ones.  


Living life can truly the most beautiful of non-selfish acts.


[ Getting lost in the city with your best friends with no pictures to tell the story ]
[ Spittin the best freestyles you have ever heard in your life with no mp3 to hear ]
[ Drawing the most beautiful heart with words "4EVA" only to be wiped away by the tides ]


The stories live in our memories.  Life is lived together as one.